Satellite signal, garage door opener

Post title: things that are causing problems at the moment.  Got home last night, opened the garage door with the opener in the car, no problem - but the one on the wall of the garage isn't working again.  I wonder if it's damp - the batteries in it felt a bit damp.  Maybe tomorrow I'll be motivated to deal with it.  This evening I turned on the TV for the first time since I left for Alabama last week and discovered I have problems with the receiver, no picture at all.  Not a total shock, since I've had that receiver since 2004.  After a lot of discussion with DirecTV, I was told someone would have to call me from another department tomorrow.  News for them: if anything about fixing this problem is going to cost me anything, I'll be canceling my service - it's just not worth it to me.  After that, there was an emergency call to my parents asking them to tape the latest episode of Mad Men, the last showings of which are early tomorrow morning, plus the next one as well, in case I end up without TV service.  They don't get BBC America, so the last two episodes of the other current show I'm watching that doesn't show up on Hulu, Being Human, will have to wait until it's on DVD on Fletnix if the TV situation isn't solved by next week.

Stuff done: insurance updated at pharmacy, real estate tax checks written and mailed off, hairspray purchased to deal with new hairstyle (today my hair is a mess o' frizz and some waves, since I decided to give it a break from the hairdryer).  Also found a fabulous color of nail polish that I couldn't resist ("Royal Rajah Ruby" from OPI, if anyone's curious) - I'm hopeless at applying nail polish, but after the pedicure on Tuesday, and given the fact that I'm not working in the cabinet shop anymore, I might start wearing it.  If I have the patience.  Not that essential tremor makes applying nail polish easy.  If nothing else, I intend to get pedicures a little more often.

And... I'm back in Illinois, and back to spending a lot of time on the verge of tears.  It feels horribly out of control to be walking around a grocery store and feeling like I'm going to start sobbing at any moment.  Turning a corner and catching sight of the nutrition drinks is a sure-fire way to bring that feeling on.  But really, I don't even need a trigger - I just miss Jerry so much, I just ache to have him come home to me, and there is nothing I can do but exist through this, try to breathe my way through the feeling of panic that hits me every so often, this panicky fear that he really isn't going to come back ever again.  I've forgotten what it's like to have an everyday conversation with him - I can't bring our everyday interactions to mind.  I hope the memories come back someday.  This is just so hard.  It hurts so much.