Dear Anonymous,
I can't believe how long it's been since I last posted here. And starting a post at 11 pm when I have to get up for work in seven hours - probably not smart. So let me just say, first off, thanks for checking in on me all these months. And second off, I'm still here, I'm still working (although, sadly, in some ways, the workplace is regressing back towards what it was when I left - perhaps it's the nature of the organization itself?). I'm still in my house and still dealing with the ongoing need for repairs (next up: remodeling of the constantly clogging drain in front of the garage and replacement of the roofs on the garage and the house - waiting for an estimate for the former, already signed a contract for the latter, which will happen some time in September).
Emotionally? Still on the roller coaster. Still, after three years, feeling like I can't really be a widow. Still feeling sort of separate from the rest of the world, as if they're all living normal lives and I'm stuck in this widow's existence of loss and muddling through each day. It's not unrelenting pain and sorrow - but it still doesn't feel like life, somehow. I feel like I'm waiting for life to start again, although of course I realize this *is* life. And I still don't know where I'm going to end up.
And, of course, I'm also still, 24 hours later, stunned and furious and incredibly sad at the verdict from Sanford yesterday.
So that's the Karen Needs To Go To Bed quickie version. Possibly you've motivated me to post again, Anonymous. To be seen. But thanks again for caring.
