32

32 is the age Gloria Stuart, the Titanic actress, as most of us under the age of 70 probably know her, was when Jerry was born (if I'm doing my math right).  Stuart died yesterday at the age of 100.  Yes, my brain is still doing that.

[Just deleted a screed about how bad the screenplay of Titanic is.]

Tired, although I think I'm sleeping a bit better in the past few days.  And an added plus, no foot cramp today - I've decided that's what the foot pain probably was.  And whether or not it was Prozac-related, I don't know.  I'd say "knock wood" it doesn't come back, but since Jerry died, I've been weaning myself off of saying things like that, or crossing fingers, or wishing on stars.  I never seriously believed in any of that, but now I even find the saying of them or the thinking of them repulsive.  I wished on every star in the damn sky and crossed every digit and hoped with every fiber of my being, and Jerry still suffered, and Jerry still died.  I can't get angry over wishing on stars not working - well, I can, but that would be listed in the "insane" column - but I can stop myself from doing that sort of thing.

Speaking of things that would be listed in the "insane" column, I've got to stop saying "I miss my honey, I miss my honey" out loud when I'm out in public - I do it at home alone all the time, but sometimes I forget and realize I've said it at, say, the mall today, where I was in search of a black blazer, having tried on the black jacket from a suit I own and realized that the fact that I got it at least 17 years ago is the reason for the huge shoulder pads in it (skirt still fits, somehow, amazingly).  Luckily I don't think anyone was near at the time.  (Blazer is on order - found it at a store aimed at people less than half my age, the sales clerk was wearing it in large, so I was able to try hers on, and I'm having it shipped to Lynne so I can wear it this weekend if I feel like it.  If it gets there on time.  Which they say it will.)