Because I can't help it, I just watched more videos of Sacred Harp singings - this time Holly Springs and Liberty Decoration Day from 1999. There we are, younger, so much still ahead of us. There I am, bouncing all over the place when I lead (and probably singing alto, too, I blush to say). There's Jerry, his hair darker, longer. Because of the situation at the time, to the outside world then we were still just traveling buddies, if people were even connecting us at all. Traveling buddies who were secretly in love.
I'm in most of the shots, because I'm sitting in the alto section at both singings, with the camera facing the altos most of the time. The altos' reactions to everything are usually on full display in Sacred Harp videos, since the camera tends to face the leader, and the leader stands, most of the time, with his back to the altos.
When the camera occasionally sweeps around to the tenor, you see Jerry at Holly Springs, sitting next to Kelly Beard. Back to the alto and there I am, sitting next to Amanda Denson. There's Kenneth DeLong at Holly Springs. Lamar Smith at Liberty. Jimmie Denney at Holly Springs, Felton Denney, Mattie Townsel.
It's one of those things that happen to newcomers to Sacred Harp singing: first you sit and listen during the memorial lesson, and the names on the list of the deceased are not familiar to you. Then you keep going to singings, and you meet people, and you start recognizing the names on the memorial lists. They're people you've met, people you've sat beside, people you know. Then, sometimes, things get even more personal, even more painful.
Come August, I will hear Jerry's name read aloud on a memorial list for the first time.
What I will not be doing next month at Lookout Mountain is sitting in the alto section.
If I have the courage to go at all.
I hope you will be able to go, and be surrounded by the love of all those people whom you also have loved.
ReplyDeleteSending good thoughts your way.